[CaptainCrunch]

So I was joking a while ago that trouble comes in threes. For me the first two hit when a friend of mine and his wife were murdered, then I was laid off from my job of the last 7 years.

This isn't about me, though it effects me. I was joking about the whole trouble comes in three thing. I had two things happen, whats next? The NHL season gets locked out, the stamps lose the rest of the games in the season, Disney announces that the next trilogy of movies will be a prequel story about Jar Jar Binks

Tonight after I got done with my interviews I got a call from my dad. A family member who had been going through a rough time killed himself tonight. He got eaten by the depression monster, and the sad thing is that we couldn't find a way to help him because he basically had left town to find himself.

Well I think somewhere a long the way, a person that faced several crisis and separating himself from his friends and family to go on a cross country track, maybe lost the battles to his demons. unbuckled his seat belt and ended his life.

We all talk about looking for signs of mental illness and depression and others. But I need to add to it. If someone close to you says that he needs to leave town for a while to get away from the situation that he's in, and to find himself . . . . don't let him or her do that.

I'm convinced that loneliness is an animal that slowly devours us. I remember watching the movie, its a wonderful life a long time ago where George Bailey stands on a bridge and contemplates suicide and an angel tries to save him by showing him flashbacks of his life, and then a timeline without him and convinces him that life is worth living.

Well tonight I believe that we have to act like that angel and just be aware when someone is flailing.

Look, I don't know what to say, the last time I saw him was at Christmas and I didn't see this coming, and then when things were starting to fall apart for him, I just mis read it or convinced myself that he would bounce back or recover because he seemed like that kind of person. He was funny and personable and never seemed like the kind of guy that would let anything get to him. Man, I was totally wrong.

Depression is a monster that has to be dealt with, its not a matter of stiff upper lip, or buck up the sun will come up tomorrow, its beyond the simple solution. If you know of someone or worried about someone, or have talked about someone that you suspect that might be struggling but you're not sure, pick up the phone, get in your car or just send out an invite and reach out and maybe just make sure they know they have someone.

I don't know if much of this is making sense, things are jumbled and confusing right now, and I just got done talking to the people that I needed too, and now I'm waiting for the funeral.

Personally I was feeling pretty good, the job hunt was going well, I had two good interviews today and more to come this week. Now I don't know what to feel.