[Coach]

Originally Posted by Bring_Back_Shantz

What you and every other dude who thinks this is a slippery slope leading to a day when no one can ever ask anyone out is missing is that equality doesn't mean everyone is being treated equally.

I won't speak for anyone else, but for me this is missing the point of what people like Cliff and myself are mentioning. It's not a fear mongering thing, and it's certainly not an advocacy for stopping people speaking out about their feelings or really even a "slippery slope" argument of some impending sexless world. It's just and observation that men are becoming more guarded in their interactions with women both in the workplace and otherwise. Again, this should come as a surprise to no one. It's a natural reaction. That's the whole point of the #metoo movement. To adjust our behaviour. Some of us are maybe, not "concerned about", but interested in, the finer nuances between the universally understood lines of sexual assault and harassment and instances of one-off jokes, foot-in-mouth moments, or just being a socially awkward person and being worried about being labeled something worse (creepy, something that can spread and exaggerate amongst friend groups) because you misread something. Yes power-driven sexual harassment/assault is the proverbial atom bomb here, the fallout is a bunch of different things. Discussing what are natural causalities in human behaviour is not a sky-is-falling outlook. It's not a bad thing to suggest women may end up having to be more forward than they have traditionally been due to a massive sweep of men's behaviour being exposed as overall pretty piggish. Being worried about whether or not we fall into that category is natural (yes, even if you very much don't).

Like it or not, men are, and should be held to a higher standard when it comes to things like this because by and large, we are likely in a position that will make women feel uncomfortable when we make comments like that.

Is the male bartender going to be offended by this? Maybe.
Is he going to feel like he us unsafe, or unable to defend himself should it go farther than lewd comments? Probably not.

Now ask the same questions about a female server and male customers.

The fact is women have many reasons beyond "I don't want to have sex with that guy" that that sort of interaction may make them uncomfortable. And guys who say "If it's not okay for me to make those kinds of remarks, why is it okay for women?" are missing the point entirely.
It's not solely about the comments, there is a whole lot of context that goes along with it. And you know what, in the right context, sometimes it is okay for you to make those kinds of remarks, sometimes it isn't. The issue is, too many dudes don't understand which is which.

I agree with this, except if a male coworker leans into a conversation women are having about explicit stuff regarding men around them, and implies it makes them uncomfortable, the proper response (like if the roles were reversed) is to apologize and change the subject. No different than any other social setting where a topic is making someone uncomfortable. Not to jump at them and give them a dressing down about some warped view of feminism that they think gives them the right to be gross.