Quote:
Originally Posted by chedder
10. Avoid telling little girls they're pretty and cute or commenting on their hairstyle or clothing. I know, little girls often wear fun stuff and it's easy to comment on. But it tells her, and the little boys nearby, that girls should be valued first and foremost for their looks.
This is one area where I fall down. Probably out of habit with my own daughters. It's awfully easy to say, " You look pretty in that outfit/hairstyle honey/sweetheart". They are 10 and 13. Not sure I see what's wrong as I also commend them for academic and athletic pursuits and just for generally being great little people most of the time. I should ask them what they think.
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It's like a reflex. I have to stop myself from commenting on/complimenting little girl's appearances. It's just like the "go-to" thing to say. Ugh.
I guess the thing that stands out to me is we commend our daughters for their numerous other achievements TOO. But our sons we just don't reflexively say, really ever, "oh that looks handsome, honey", or even "that looks very stylish". Like I tell my son when he gets a haircut that it looks nice, but that's about the only time his looks are ever discussed. Also I struggled there to think up another positive compliment on a young boys looks other than "handsome", but for girls we have about a billion adjectives to comment on their appearance.
Anyways. Me too, y'all.