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Old 12-22-2016, 11:04 AM   #362
Cecil Terwilliger
That Crazy Guy at the Bus Stop
 
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Springfield Penitentiary
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Muffins View Post
How these encounters should go:

Cop: Sir, we're with the CPS. We have reason to believe this is a stolen item. Do you have a receipt for this?

Seller: Why yes I do. Here it is.

Cop: Alright then, have a good day sir.


How I imagine they go:

Cop: GET ON THE GROUND MOTHERF***ER!!!!!!

**proceeds to pat down guy who is totally a criminal**

**Throws him in the back of a police car**

Cop: Oh, I almost forgot to ask. Do you have a receipt for that?

Seller: ummmm, yeah.

Cop: Whoops my bad. I just get so excited I forget to ask first.
Don't forget:

Seller: Umm, can I have my legally purchased goods back?

Cops: go #### yourself. hahahahahahaha. Your goods are now part of an ongoing investigation. Even though you've provided sufficient proof that these are 100% legally purchased and not the stolen goods we're looking for, we're going to keep them because why the hell not? We can and you can't stop us.
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