[CaptainCrunch]

I think we should just form a errr CP party, not the conservative Party. But the Calgary Puck party, of course with me established as the leader of the party.

We stand for three things

1) Socially Progressive - We believe that everyone is equal and the province is one big friendly puppy filled pit of inclusion. We all have rights, and we respect everyone elses rights to live and enjoy their lives. Except for Oiler fans who will become the lower class slave miners of our glorious home land

2) fiscally Conservative - That's right we believe that this province has more of a spending problem then a revenue problem. While we agree that there is some adjusting of taxation that is going to have happen, that the current regime is being punitive. We also believe that the whole argument that if you cut dollars services will suffer is a tired BS answer to a hard question. We believe that the front line services are bloated and for the most part poorly run and over staffed in terms of administration. There needs to be an adjustment to how dollars are spent, and how we work with and reward front line workers like teachers and doctors and nurses. Also we need to raise revenue, so I propose that we turn Edmonton into a massive energy generation center using the hot air emanating from the Oilers management team and fans, which should heat our houses forever with no carbon emissions. Also we will set up a extremely large factory to make sweatpants and sandals and dress socks, Edmontonians know their fashion and we can stock the factory with lowly paid Oiler fans who would believe that these horrible low paid jobs, like their horrible over paid team are awesome.


3) A end to voter dissatisfaction, if you elect me as the leader of the CP party and the people feel free to elect me as the provincial leader, I will suspend the concept of voting and democracy. In a salute and gesture to the ultimate expression of listening to the people who don't want to vote, I say why not! I say no votes for anyone!. On top of that as a reward for this faith by the former electorate, I will spend $400.00 per year per citizen in this province so that everyone will get a free subscription to Netflix, Showmi and CraveTV. A distracted television watching populous is a happy television watching populous.


4) The construction of the CaptainCrunch Calgary Megatorium. The new home for the Flames, The Stamps and all the other sports teams in Calgary. It will feature the best of everything including a 30 story salute to me your benevolent and concerned dictator. This statue will have me standing, facing north with both middle fingers extended to our slave pit to the North.