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Old 04-07-2016, 03:31 PM   #16
Frequitude
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Join Date: Jul 2005
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Been married once with another (final) one on the way.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cecil Terwilliger View Post
1) Gifts. I only give cash but the question is how much? G/f and I are attending the wedding of a friend of hers. They are reasonably close but not so close that she's a bridesmaid. I figure we should each give $100 each. Enough to cover our meals plus a little extra.
Cash is king. It is exactly what the couple wants and needs. They don't need that fish descaler from William Sonoma or that china set from The Bay. They're just going to return them so they can get the big items they need (couches, beds, furniture, etc.). All those little stupid things effectively just become "gift cards" with the hassle of you having to buy them and them having to return them to get the credit. My rule of thumb is $100 per person for quasi friends and $100 per person plus a thoughtful gift for good friends and family.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Cecil Terwilliger View Post
2) Who pays for what? No one seems to know who is on the hook for things. Do the groomsmen pay for their own suits? What about bridesmaids and their dresses? Tux rentals? Buy suits for keeps? Pay a portion?
Been on both sides of this. Most times I've paid. Only once was my clothing requirement supplied (it was a specific tie). In general I think it is very common for the bridesmaids/groomsmen to pay for their own outfits. If you can afford it, then ya it's probably a nice gesture.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Cecil Terwilliger View Post
3) Who does what? One of my lady friends says that bridesmaids are supposed to do a bunch of work for the wedding. Is that normal? Does the bride normally use the bridesmaids as her personal assistants for 6 months before the wedding? I was a groomsman and I had very few responsibilities. Maybe it is a man/woman thing.
Definitely a man/woman thing. Only groomsmen/best man responsibilities are plan a badass bachelor party, do whatever they're told to help out with logistics on the day of, and don't lose the rings on the day of. On the ladies side, totally depends on the bride's OCD/controlling/bridezilla tendencies. In general, I'd say its whatever the bride wants and her friends suck it up and get revenge when they get married.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Cecil Terwilliger View Post
4) More gifts. Is it normal for the bride/groom to buy gifts for the bridesmaids/groomsmen?
Yes.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Cecil Terwilliger View Post
Any other general suggestions?
Marriage is like making pancakes. You always burn the first one.
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