Quote:
Originally Posted by Slava
Over the last few years I have gotten a lot less frugal. Much of this has to do with my work and helping clients retire. Its not that I don't save or invest for myself and my future, because I absolutely do and much like Croflames noted I just feel a sense of satisfaction knowing that I have money set aside and working for me.
At the same time I have had a number of clients work like dogs, save and invest and then right after, or just as they retire they die. I deal with their widows still, and we have some heartfelt conversations and I've realised that this has made a huge impact on me personally (which isn't surprising really). One told me point blank that "they could've saved more, but those memories of travel and enjoying life are all she has with her late husband" and that really struck me. When I read these blogs and advice columns of people who don't buy lattés or won't allow whatever entertainment or travel purely to save a few bucks I actually feel genuinely sorry for them. I know that I would look back at myself and think "what a complete idiot!" to miss out doing things or enjoying things just to increase my bank account.
I'm not for a second suggesting that people should throw caution to the wind, save zero dollars and run up debt. But saving every nickel just to build a bank roll when you could do some stuff in your life without endangering your financial situation is just as stupid, only you don't realise that yet.
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For sure, but you absolutely have to save as a priority and the fun stuff has to be secondary. If you can't afford the fun stuff, you just don't get it and you have to accept that. The problem I see when people hear what you are saying is they don't internalize every point. You were very clear when you said that you save money, but the more engaging part of you post was about how pleasurable it is to spend it; how people don't regret giving themselves great experiences.
Surely, you must have seen plenty of people who gave themselves so many great experiences that they are now experiencing a super crappy retirement or no retirement at all. Or maybe not. Maybe those types never set foot into your office, which wouldn't surprise me.
It's easy for an old widow to wax poetic about how they should have gone to Paris more when they were younger and that's easy to say from the position of somebody comfortably retired, but to get to the point of being comfortably retired you need to save a lot of money and sacrifice a few toys and trips on your way to get there.
I know I could die at 64 and everybody would be all 'poor guy, all he did was work and save,' but they'd be wrong. I'm planning for a long and happy life. I know I can't work productively/lucratively when I'm 75, so I have to do that now. If I die early, that's the way it is, but I want the opportunity to live an awesome retirement, not blow it all on crap I don't need now.
I think you're a bit older than me (I'm 39), but I too have been able to become less frugal in some ways as I've aged. My wife and I deliberately tried to frontload stress and financial obligations when we were younger in order to get more comfortable with age and it has worked with the added benefit of instilling some really good habits. Being able to become a little looser with the purse strings is a reward for good money management that you have to earn.
Sounds like you're there and that's good. But the value of being there as it relates to other people is the manner in which you got to that point (unless you're from a wealthy family in which case your experience isn't transferable to the average person looking to earn more financial freedom). Young people (or any person) need to earn that comfort. Too many people are taking the comforts of wealth on debt and their future selves and families will pay the price, with interest.