Quote:
Originally Posted by CrazyCaper
My kids are(and always will be) my #1 priority. Let's make that clear right now!!! However, just because I'm a parent, does that mean that I forfeit the opportunity to try and have a relationship as well? That's why I reached out to the CP community to ask for advice at making this work well for all parties involved. I don't need to feel like I'm being judged for wanting someone who cares about me in my life, other than my kids.
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Well, if there is only one correct answer to your question, why ask it? My first point was, it depends on how old your kids are. If they're not in school, then you don't have time to date. If they're in high school and have a level of independence, then maybe you do have time. If your kids are awarded an hour with you in the am, and an hour in the pm and a vacant house/babysitter the rest of the time, they're getting the short end of the stick. If your gf only gets one night a week with you, she's probably getting the short end of the stick. Who would you rather rip off?
If all you want is assurance that your kids are fine with you dating somone, you're not really asking a question. You're just giddy about meeting someone. And if you're touchy about the possibility that they are not fine with it, then maybe you're putting your kids behind your need to have a relationship. But without details of your life, you're not going to get anything but a philosophical point.
My one and only point is true....you only get one chance to
prove to your kids that they are number 1. Not having a relationship for a few years while your kid grows up is not a big deal. You had a relationship when you made the kid. You will have decades to have a relationship when the kid is grown up. If you're confident
they feel that they are number 1, then you probably have time to date.