Quote:
Originally Posted by Eastern Girl
I don't know what's left to say. I'm not sure I have much left in me to say truthfully. I feel very strongly about this topic and my opinion has not swayed. I maintain that this board can be a very unwelcoming place for women. I think the way I have been treated (by some, not all) in this thread and others serves as an example of how unwelcoming this site can be for women.
I posted my thoughts, after being asked for them, and I took a beating for it. I've been called whiny, loud, self righteous, childish, hypocritical, too sensitive/PC, and was part of the squeaky wheel club. And why? Because I asked people to think before they speak. Some took what I thought was a simple request, and turned it on its ear talking about extreme "what if" scenarios. It hurts to see an argument that I thought was made sincerely and thoughtfully belittled and rejected as imagined sexism.
It's especially unfair, in my opinion, because all we did was ask for some consideration and respect. I didn't ask for a complete crackdown on anything remotely directed at a female. I am honestly shocked at the reaction. I didn't think this would be such a controversial situation. I am a very laid back person, but some of what I have read in this thread truly breaks my heart. I have a little baby niece and I weep thinking about what she is going to have to face in her lifetime.
I thought we had a decent discussion going on at times, but it's been derailed with discussion and focus on my avatar. So in the interest of moving forward, I will take down my avatar. I am doing this so we can move on with the discussion and we can hopefully come to some understanding of what can be done to better the site. I am also hoping that others will follow suit and reconsider their avatars.
Since this post seems to be creeping into martyrdom territory, I will wrap this up by saying that I really do feel strongly about this topic. I've experienced sexism and discrimination on a near daily basis, so it is difficult to not respond to some posts with anything but anger. If my anger got the better of me as a result, I apologize. If you think I've been childish, please don't let that paint our whole argument as simple angry ramblings that are without merit.
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This post sums up so much about my thoughts on the topic.
Sexism and misogyny are a big part of every day life for many women. We are bombarded daily with both overt and subtle implications that we're not as smart as men, we're not as strong as men, we're not as important as men, we're merely here to sell products and give men something to enjoy looking at.
It's infuriating to consistently have your thoughts, feelings, talents, and skills belittled and ignored because of your gender. (Not talking about CP here--talking about the world in general) Because you were born with XX chromosomes rather than XY chromosomes, you're made to feel inferior. So yes, we get angry. Yes, we might get a little overly incensed in a discussion about sexism/misogyny/feminism. Because these issues are part of
daily life, we cannot escape them.
We didn't demand that the YLYL thread be deleted--we weren't even the ones who brought up the conversation, a moderator was the one to ask the question in the first place--because the moderators as well were questioning the thread. The thread itself was rather inconsequential--as both myself and EG and several others have pointed out. The tone of that thread and a lot of other comments made are the issue. It was not our decision to close the thread--we merely asked, all along, for a little respect and thoughtfulness before people spoke.
All of this hyperbole talk of censorship or slippery slope or "squeaky wheel" is infuriating. It was a T&A thread on a hockey message board, whether it stayed or left was no real concern to me, it didn't affect my life that dramatically one way or the other. But to see the reaction to its deletion is utterly insane to me. An RIP thread is necessary? Really? Again--it's a simple T&A thread, on the internet, which is full of millions of images of T&A. There are a million other places to look at girly pictures. CP is an interesting, diverse community that generally is full of very good people and wonderful conversation. For those who want the YLYL thread--it's easy to find other sites with girly pictures. Hell, just go to a Victoria's Secret website. Or watch ads for beer on Youtube. There are images of sexy, beautiful women all over magazines and billboards. Images similar to what were in the YLYL thread are on every newsstand in the US and Canada. Those images are really, really easy to come by.
For those of us who prefer a community with less overt sexism and misogyny, it's much harder to find a community as solid as CP elsewhere. So just think a little bit before you speak. Think about how you'd feel if someone said that thing to/about your sister, wife, daughter, mother. "Political correctness" isn't some terrible thing--political correctness just means attempting to not be an insensitive jackass.