Yep, I'm a perfect example of this. I used to use fag as a slur on CP all the time because a) I thought it sounded funny (stupid, looking back) and b) I thought because I was so in favour and supportive of equal rights that I was somehow exempt from being in the wrong while using it.
It was never moderation that drove me away from it, it was a specific discussion, and many comments from other users that eventually made me reflect on my use of the word and then stop using it. In other words, the culture of Calgarypuck dictated that the word fag would no longer be socially acceptable here, and now when I see people use it, I cringe.
More recently, I was using the term "######ed". I didn't mean it maliciously, I just kind of used it, just like how a just kind of used the word fag. Then someone didn't respond directly to me, but 8 posts after mine said something like "I can't believe people use the word ######ed in a derogatory way in 2014, that shouldn't be acceptable on CP".
So I stopped using that, too. And really that's what I hope this thread and the eventual removal of the YLYL thread will do; Cause people to take a step back and go "Okay, this isn't just about the thread, it's about our culture on the board. Who's being marginalized? How am I offending them and making them feel like they don't fit on CP? Am I a decent person, and should therefore just simply make an effort to be more inclusive?