Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Mike Oxlong
What happens if you want to buy tickets to a Flames game or go play a round of golf with your friends? Do you simply take it out of the joint account? Do you need permission or do you have the flexibility to make those decisions?
I wouldn't say I "need" things to make me happy. I want to make both of us happy but we don't always share the same interests. If I want to golf or go to a hockey game that isn't always something she wants to do, meanwhile she might want to go for drinks with her friends or spend money on something I have no interest in. If it makes her happy great. She should have the freedom to do those things as well.
|
You and her are combining your lives, it's like being on a team. You're the offensive centre and she's the defence. You don't need "permission" to drive to the net or pass the puck back, but you had better let the other person know whats going on or things aren't going to work.
If you are both honest about your goals and expectations, then you can work it out. If you both know what the family budget is then you know what your disposible income is for the month. I don't have to get every single purchase "approved", but I have to realize that every dollar I spend is a dollar that isn't saved, and if we have a goal of saving for a house (for example), that impacts the plan. And if I spend too much I can impact her disposable income.
The way we work it is similar to most of the others.. we have one account and everything goes into that account and everything comes out. Small stuff is no big deal, but if one is going to spend a couple of hundred bucks on an unplanned purchase then we just consult with the other.. Sometimes she'll remind me that we need that money for a trip, or she'll just say "that sounds fun".
If you set up a confrontational system, you will end up with confrontations. If you set up a system that promotes team work and communication, then that's what you'll get.
Exceptions of course are people who are horrible financially, or can't control their spending. Then you can do things like fixed allowances for each and such.
Plus the majority income earner might change from time to time.. I know in my house it's switched 4-5 times already.
Ultimately though I treat my marrige as a partnership, 50/50. One may make more but we both have equal rights to it.
I must say though I'm suprised at the responses here, I would have guessed a majority would have said seperate accounts (just from what I've seen with other couples).