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More and more, the standards are set by engineers and technical experts and lawyers, with little meaningful input from “people who know anything about children’s play,”
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Very little, if any, of the current situation would be directly because of engineers or technical staff. Instruction comes from up above. They're just doing what's they're told.
The wild card, here, is the lawyers. So much liability and fear of getting sued. That's infected other aspects of the culture.
Then look at all the emphasis on bullying. This is not a recent phenomenon. Bigger kids shoved smaller kids into lockers as long as there's been schools. Threats, intimidation and harm can't always be avoided. It's better to equip children with problem solving skills, which will better serve them later in life.