Quote:
Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch
I'd like to offer my services to your cabal as Minister of Torture
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I hope you have references.
Please keep in mind that Torture responsibilities are both internal and external. Expectations for external torture include:
- Promising jobs to Nova Scotians, then sending them Fort McMurray, in the winter, to work at Tim Hortons.
- Showing pictures of trees to Saskatchewanians.
- Rigging elections in Toronto to ensure Rob Ford is mayor for the rest of his life.
- Maintaining a steady supply of hearts, lungs, and livers to keep Rob Ford lifespan longer than 6 weeks.
- Incorporating restaurants with English names in Quebec, followed by distributing flyers and menus in English. Refuse to serve poutine.
- Running pipeline projects through BC that are visible from space and form a giant 1978 Vancouver Canucks uniform, yellow version, with yellow helmet.