I'm not so sure you need to cut them out of your life entirely.
I get the sense that you've basically absorbed a lot of emotional damage over the last several years, and that for the most part you've internalized it, trying to be the "bigger person" in all the circumstances.
The problem with just taking damage all the time is that it creates certain perceptions and expectations, i.e, that you can continue to take it, or that you're not as upset as you actually are.
It sounds to me that you need to finally assert yourself. Be very clear, and very firm, about where you stand and what you will no longer put up with. Set your boundaries and mean it: if they are crossed, you will not tolerate it. It doesn't sounds like displays of anger are really in your nature, but it may take a good one to jolt your sister into a real understanding of where you're coming from, and the fact you're very serious about where you're going.
Once you've clearly established where you stand, she can decide where she stands. If she chooses not to stand with you, then the decision to end your relationship hasn't been yours, it's been hers.
But I think, before you abandon that relationship entirely, you should make it crystal clear how you feel, and how you need things to be. That way, if you end up having to wash your hands of the whole thing, you'll have done so honestly, and you'll know you did it for the right reasons.
It sounds like you already know what's right for you. Now the trick is to stand up and do it.
I bet you'll feel a lot better after. At least I hope so.
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