Too bad we don't have some real nastiness on this board. Someone should reach out to him for a massive kitchen renovation, even if he asks for a deposit. Then get close to him tell him that your a freeman on the land and get him to do the work under the table to allow him to avoid paying taxes to the "man".
When he finishes the work, tell him that under the terms of admirality law you can create currency and pay him with a rock. then take the money that was saved and give it to that little old lady.
If he raises a stink tell him that you'll report him to the CRA for being willing to work under the table.
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My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
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