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This isn't something I feel good about dragging onto a hockey forum (realize there is much more here, of course) and the embarrassment hasn't set it fully
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You have no need to feel embarrassed. As you can see from the replies here, everyone is being really helpful and supportive. I think you're very brave to ask for help in such a public way. I hope the positive reaction this thread is receiving will serve as an example for other people who also need support but are too embarrassed to ask for it.
Several other posters have already provided you with many useful links and resources, so this may be redundant at this point, but I've also sent a link to this thread to my wife. She's a social worker in Calgary, and although she isn't specifically involved in the type of support you need, I'm sure she knows the right people and organizations for you to contact.