http://snltranscripts.jt.org/05/05lbuy.phtml
CP; Did you know that Thousands of Calgarians wear jerseys to the Dome that are not red? That's why I developed this unique new program for managing your wardrobe. It's called [presents book] "Don't Wear Jerseys that Are Not Red."
Wife: Let me see that... [grabs book, reads] "If you don't have a red jersey, you should not wear another color." Hmm, sounds interesting
Husband: Sounds confusing.
Husband: Well let's say I don't have a red jersey. Should I wear black or white?
CP: No-o-o-o.
Wife: Well what if you have a red jersey, can you wear it?
CP: Yes.
Wife: Now take the red away. Same story?
CP: Nope. You shouldn't wear jerseys that are not red.
Announcer: So get in style now, write for your free copy of "Don't Wear Jerseys That Are Not Red." If you order now you'll also receive, "Seriously, If You Don't Have A Red Jersey, Don't Wear Another Color!" Along with a 12-month subscription to "Stop Wearing Black or White." So order today!