[Rathji]

This reminds me of my 18th birthday.

My dad was working up in Edmonton, but I was doing some work with his business partner down in Calgary. They conspired together and during a break at work, this lady comes in with a long coat on and walks over to my desk. I was a little confused, especially by the guy behind her carrying a small stereo system. He sets it down on the table, hits play and her coat comes off.

Of course, she was wearing nothing but a g-string, and the goods were spectacular. Grapefruit sized and smashing me in the face, during the lapdance, I was in heaven. Until she moved around behind me and put them over my face, that is. At first it was strange, and then I realized that I couldn't breathe. I start trying to maneuver myself to get some air, but it was futile.

Finally, I had to push her off me, gasping for dear life. That, combined with the less than stellar reaction from the female co-worker sitting beside me, ended my wonderful (and interestingly enough only) experience with strippers.

I often wonder how good the rest of that dance would have gone, had I not so dearly treasured my life.

I think it would have been worth it.