Calgarypuck Forums - The Unofficial Calgary Flames Fan Community - View Single Post

krazycanuck · 10-19-2012, 03:27 AM

desperate times call for desperate measures.

Step 1) On a day when you're home and he's not, cook a delicious aromatic dinner. Something so that even hours after the food is gone, the smell will remain. You want it to hit him as soon as he walks in the door. Make him want that dinner.

Step 2) Enjoy said dinner. Enjoy lots of it. You'll need it.

Step 3) Take a plastic container that you don't mind throwing out. It CANNOT be clear.

Step 4) Poop in the container.

Step 5) put the lid on the container, with your name CLEARLY written on the top.

Step 6) move anything you can from your main fridge into your room fridge. Also move anything which could be used as a weapon from your home into your room.

Step 7) place the poop surprise in the fridge, in clear view.

Step 8) lock yourself in your room, and wait...

Step 9) Your roommate will come home, smell the delicious food you cooked and will try and find some for himself. Usually heading straight for the fridge and discovering your dookie delight.

Step 10) This is where things become less clear. One of three things will happen.

A) He will try and storm your room, this is why you stockpiled weapons. use them if necessary for self defense. Once you hear the fridge open, dialing 9-1 on your cell phone is also a good precaution. As is having the window already open for a quick escape.

B) He will laugh that you went against everything you were taught in your formative years and pooped in a cottage cheese container. After he is done vomiting. You two will have a good laugh and become good friends. He will respect your property moving forward.

C) He will put the poop back in the fridge as if it was untouched, so you can not mock him for it later. After vomiting in the bathroom, he will have a heart to heart with himself in the mirror and make a promise to himself that he will never touch your "crap" again. He may however try something similar as revenge. Eat out for a couple months to be careful.

Godspeed soldier.

PS...if you decide to go this route, please film/livestream it for the enjoyment of CP.

10-19-2012, 03:27 AM	#8
krazycanuck Won the Worst Son Ever Award Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Sherwood Park Exp:	desperate times call for desperate measures. Step 1) On a day when you're home and he's not, cook a delicious aromatic dinner. Something so that even hours after the food is gone, the smell will remain. You want it to hit him as soon as he walks in the door. Make him want that dinner. Step 2) Enjoy said dinner. Enjoy lots of it. You'll need it. Step 3) Take a plastic container that you don't mind throwing out. It CANNOT be clear. Step 4) Poop in the container. Step 5) put the lid on the container, with your name CLEARLY written on the top. Step 6) move anything you can from your main fridge into your room fridge. Also move anything which could be used as a weapon from your home into your room. Step 7) place the poop surprise in the fridge, in clear view. Step 8) lock yourself in your room, and wait... Step 9) Your roommate will come home, smell the delicious food you cooked and will try and find some for himself. Usually heading straight for the fridge and discovering your dookie delight. Step 10) This is where things become less clear. One of three things will happen. A) He will try and storm your room, this is why you stockpiled weapons. use them if necessary for self defense. Once you hear the fridge open, dialing 9-1 on your cell phone is also a good precaution. As is having the window already open for a quick escape. B) He will laugh that you went against everything you were taught in your formative years and pooped in a cottage cheese container. After he is done vomiting. You two will have a good laugh and become good friends. He will respect your property moving forward. C) He will put the poop back in the fridge as if it was untouched, so you can not mock him for it later. After vomiting in the bathroom, he will have a heart to heart with himself in the mirror and make a promise to himself that he will never touch your "crap" again. He may however try something similar as revenge. Eat out for a couple months to be careful. Godspeed soldier. PS...if you decide to go this route, please film/livestream it for the enjoyment of CP.