[CaptainCrunch]

She's going to be on the time life cover again in about 10 years with the title, look I'm a helicopter.

Its funny how things have changed.

In my day, it was off the tit, out of the parents bed, and you can cry all you want we ain't coming. What's the matter with your legs, can't you get your own glass of water. Here's a damn bat I ain't looking under your bed for monsters.

Then it was its only a skinned knee suck it up. the only way that bully is going to respect you is if you fight back, and don't come to me if you don't, and if your grades don't improve I'm gonna tell your teacher to fail you. I'll give you something to cry about.

Then it was, get a job, why don't you have a job, your grades suck, I'd be proud of you if you were ######ed. 5 years til your moving out, 4 years til your moving out, 3 years til your moving out, 2 years til your moving out, here's a hundred bucks get out of my house, I can't believe you joined the army, you keep making bad decisions but they're your decisions, that girl is no good, thank god its her families job to pay for the wedding, what the hell do you mean the wedding is off, I rented a damn tux. Followed by

You paid money for that piece of crap car? You paid money for that piece of crap house? What do you mean you don't like your job? Your getting paid perfectly good money to hate it.

Your girlfriend told me that you sniffled at the end of field of dreams, I raised a sissy

Then

Lets get a beer.