I had a psycho ex once who sent me flowers with a tag that read "from a secret admirer", and then then when I told her about it, she freaked out and demanded to know who I was screwing that would send me flowers. It's weird enough to be a dude getting flowers.
I'm glad I pulled out on her most of the time. That kid ended up in a kleenex.
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"A pessimist thinks things can't get any worse. An optimist knows they can."
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