Having been on the other side of this issue I'll just say, unplug the sub woofer.
I've tried to be reasonable with my neighbours on this as well, had a beer in the place and yes, sitting in their living room with the volume at a very reasonable level it sounds great and I honestly found myself thinking "this is a very reasonable level". But the stray bass on the other side of a floor/wall is a completely different story than what you experience in the room with the stereo. You live in a shared space and you have to respect that. You can argue till your blue in the face about the dB levels and bylaws but the fact is low level bass can travel far depending on the building construction.
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