Quote:
Originally Posted by FlamingInfinity
Just wanted to hear CP's two cents on my situation.
I broke up with my girlfriend of 3 years in October. Things were what I thought, one sided on her end. Lots of take, little give from my POV. I needed time away to find me again.
Fast forward to middle of December, talking a bit with the ex, and slowly working on things. She discovers that I was talking with this girl from back home in Alberta.
Now I'm playing the field a bit and 'the ex' thinks I can't work on things with her while also seeing other women. I can see her point to an extent, but I also believe that unless I clarify to her, that her and I are dating, that there is no real 'together' and I can see women freely.
Basically I'm asking whether it's one person at one time, or looking at your options with however many people you'd like?
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It's basically exactly whatever the two of you agree to. These terms like 'dating' and 'seeing' have no meaning except what we give them, and every couple (and often both people within a couple) have a different idea of what these terms mean. It sounds like you're saying "we're just dating so I can see other people," and she says "we're dating so you can't see other people," then you two really have no agreement about what your relationship is, even if you both use the word 'dating'. The fact that she thinks you should be working on things with her means that she expects you not to be seeing other people, unless you've both agreed that the best way to work on your relationship is to get that perspective of seeing other people.
My advice? If you're actually interested in working on that relationship, then you two need to have that talk. Feel free to try to explain that you think seeing other people could help make your relationship stronger. Personally it's not a position I believe is worth exploring except as an absolute last resort, but maybe you two are at that point.