Quote:
Originally Posted by Russic
My Grandma is currently the last remaining of her generation and my parents, aunts and uncles stand to inherit a decent amount of money. She has hinted at the idea of just giving it to them now equally as there's "no need to postpone the inevitable". Some members of the family want that, but there is one issue ... she's becoming less and less easy to care for. She is increasingly frail and her mind is getting to the point that there's concern she won't be able to care for herself much longer. A home is one option, but those are fataing expensive. That impressive inheritance that some members of my family are hoping for could be burned up quite quick if she needs several thousand dollars worth of care each month.
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While she is still lucid, your family might clarify with her what she expects of "standard of care" in her later years.
Some people do not trust their children - many with good reason - to give them the quality of care they deserve in their later years, instead choosing to put their parents in the discount bins of old folks homes so the inevitable inheritance will be larger in the end.
"He/she won't know the difference!!!," they might rationalize.
So, to protect themselves from their families, you do see people putting their expectations of standards of care in written, witnessed, signed documents.
In the end, this is your gramma's money, not that of the family, and if she wants to run it to zero before she dies she does have that right.
I do see the opposite of course, people deliberately living below their means because they want to send as much as possible to the next generation. That too is their right and choice.
None of my business, of course, but my opinion is the family should ask her what she might want, either to stay at home or in assisted living and, if the latter, what is the standard of care she is willing to pay for?
If the decision of the family is that they will collectively look after her as long as possible in her home - and that will eventually turn into a grind - then there might be some consideration of offering unequal portions of her estate to reward a daughter who is doing the bulk of the work versus a brother who doesn't care, as an example.
These are tough things to talk about, easy to put off to the next day, but its nevertheless best to have these frank conversations so everyone is on the same page.
Things to think about.
Cowperson