It takes a great deal of strength to admit to anyone - especially yourself - that you have a problem. You're right - that is Step 1 - and it is a huge step. My Dad has been a recovering alcoholic for 16 years now. I would strongly suggest trying at least one AA meeting in your area to see if it might be for you. It worked/works for my Dad and for that, I am forever grateful. They have meetings all over the city, at many different times. Some are downtown over lunches, and some are in the evenings. Don't be put off by the fact that many are in churches ... it is a spiritual group but by no means has any religious affiliation, if that puts you off. You'd be more than able to go to a meeting and just sit there without saying anything - there's no expectation that you're going to open your heart to these people upon meeting them.
If you find it works for you, or even if you don't, please let your wife know about the Al-Anon problem, which is a support group for families and friends of people with drinking problems. It may help her work through many of the issues she has relating to your drinking. My Mom has been attending these meetings for the same amount of time as my Dad has been going to AA, and still attends them even though they have been divorced for over a decade.
Wish you all the best on your journey - if you feel like talking a bit more over PM, that would be totally fine with me (or if you don't, that's fine too). Take care of yourself!
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