I am never ever having kids. I don't care how happy you all think you are, you poor poor self deluded bahstards. I hope your poo-filled diapers, puke plastered clothes/carpets/furnature/pets, sleepless nights after night after night after night, and complete lack of social life comfort you while you know the rest of your friends are out there wishing you were with them while they chase tail, get wasted and stoned and go looking for hot girls and other adventures.
But you'll fade away to them too, and it will be like it all never happened.
Mmmmmm...beer.
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So far, this is the oldest I've been.
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