[Russic]

Last year my sister and law convinced my wife and I to get an "Eco tree". It was to be 6 feet tall and indistinguishable from a standard tree. I went to pick them up (for us and the sister in law) and was greeted by a room of trees ranging from 12 - 15 feet. I found the two bushiest 12 footers they had, each with about 4 branches on them. Leaving the pick up area the girl at the register said "at least they aren't poison!". To this day that remains one of the most annoying things I've ever heard. Throwing them both into the back of an SUV (and I do mean thow ... They probably combined to around 10 pounds) I vowed that the Christmas of 2009 I would have the biggest goddamn tree ever. A real tree. A mans tree. A tree that died for my pleasure.

Tomorrow is the big day that I've been waiting 12 months for. Some wrongs are about to get righted. Another problem with last year is that I put up my lights and did a very poor job. Every day I came home to **** lights and a ****ier tree. I actually turned down rides home just so people wouldn't have to see either.

A few weeks ago I payed some guy to come do my lights for me. They look awesome, took him and another guy about 3 hours, and I got a weekend to spend with my family that didn't involve constant swearing. It's all coming together. All I need after tomorrow is some claymation Rudolph and the trifecta of christmas will be complete.