[killer_carlson]

my wife and I were fortunate to have both our respective parents chip in for the wedding.

Our parents each contributed a set amount, which was equal to each other. My wife and I picked up the rest. It worked out to about 40% for each of our parents and my wife and I had the final 20%.

My suggestion would be to pick an amount, and tell your daughter that you're happy for her to have her big day and that she has a lot of planning to do. You're able to give her $5,000, or $10,000.00 or $50,000 (or whatever) and she can put that towards a big fancy wedding or she can do a small one and keep some money for the honeymoon or whatever.

That lets the couple retain control over the wedding and keeps the parents out of having to do scheduling or getting in the way of the happy couple's plans.