[flip]

Ok one last random thought before I go study for about 10 minutes and then go to bed.

For no apparent reason I've had friends cancel plans on me in the last few days, only we never had plans to begin with.

First I called my friend who was going out for drinks with a coworker. Said she'd be home at like 830, was wondering if I wanted to chill and that she'd call me. I was busy with school but said sure because I may have been done by then.

Get a call at like 930, late enough I just assumed her previous plans went late, but I didn't care in the first place because it wasn't like we had plans anyways. She proceeds to apologize because she didn't want me to worry that she hadn't called or be mad at her for not calling. Seems kind of sincere but really just trumps up her own view of her self importance. I could give a rats ass if she called or didn't call. That isn't to say I wouldn't have minded hanging out but jesus, my life doesn't revolve around vague phone calls where we don't really make plans but say we may or may not hang out later if the opportunity arises.


Then my other friend says we should study for our midterm tomorrow. I'm not a huge fan of this but whatever, she needs the help more than I do given the fact that the subject matter is familiar to me and she's never even taken a history course before. (i've taken at least 5 and this one is only a second year course)

I call her tonight to ask what time we are going to meet up tomorrow. When I call her it is well after she gets off work. I intentionally wait to call because I don't want her to think I wanted to study and hope if I call late enough she'll also feel it isn't a good idea and not ask.

Funny part is that I got the pity act again. Different friend too. Like she's so sorry she has to cancel on me as if her presence studying would make or break my evening. Of course I was too nice to mention that I didn't want to study in the first place but whatever. Let her feel like her presence is what I live for.


I'm not so much mad, as annoyed. Since when did my chick friends think that their presence around me was all I lived for? Don't get me wrong I like hanging out with them but both conversations were beyond common courtesy. At no point, with either chick did I ever actually have plans and in both cases they asked ME to hang out with them and then called and acted like they were going to ruin my night by canceling on me. Like WTF?

I don't even know why it annoys me. I guess it is because they both seemed like the only reason they canceled plans we never had was because they think they both want to feed their egos for no reason and convince themselves I was sitting at home waiting by the phone until they called.

I hate pity. Especially fake pity.