My husband and I combined our funds and created joint accounts. We have been married for 5 years. The first year was tough...he would wonder why Im spending so much at the spa or clothes or hockey tickets (he's not really a fan, being from Kentucky) and I would wonder why he's spending so much on college basketball, golf etc. So what we do now is that every Sunday we each are allowed to take out an X amount of money (we do $100) in cash and we can spend it however you want to. We call it our "fun" money because this does not include groceries, bills, gas, or anything that we both consider a necessity. So if I want to buy expensive lipstick, if it comes out of the 100, he cant spaz, and if he decides he wants to get a magazine subscription to something, I cant complain. It works out well because we each can choose what we want to do..and if you save it, you can hve more for later. For things that can be purchased by credit card only, we can do that, but then you have to depsit the = value of that from your cash into the bank account.
Its a system that works since we each value different things.....so now there are no arguements and no need to "justify" purchases.
And with gifts, we try to just do it in cash (ie we say if one our bdays is coming up, take out the money in cash and then go buy whatever). If its something that a credit card is required (ie an online purchase) then we just tell the other person to not look at the statement until after their birthday (we tend to wait til within a month of the event anyways).....if they look, its ruined for them.
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