Calgarypuck Forums - The Unofficial Calgary Flames Fan Community - View Single Post

Locke · 07-24-2009, 11:00 AM

This is my Campaign: Copied from the Random Thoughts Thread

This is my Platform for my Campaign to be elected Internet President:

People are so much more concerned about getting thanked than of saying anything of value, and for the most part, there is little wrong with this, however, there should be more stringent limits on who is allowed to be thanked for instance no noobs and no Oiler fans should be allowed to be thanked, but they should be allowed to thank us for all of our superior insight, understanding and limitless hockey-related knowledge.

Secondly, there should be an additional feature, 'The Bitchslap.' Veteran posters should be allowed to 'bitchslap' any poster in their first 3 months of membership, its a minor feature, but it would then ban that poster from the boards for about 40 minutes. I think that would smarten people up.

Furthermore, I propose a poster curfew. Noobs and the elderly should not be allowed on the boards after 10:00, I see too many brand new posters carrying on an E-Squabbles late into the wee hours of the morning. Its like watching 'The View' when you're not drunk or high, Dante referred to it in his 'Divine Comedy' as the 10th circle of Hell.

The only conclusion that I can come to is that these individuals are not responsible enough to know when to call it a bitchfest and go to bed, nor are they sufficiently mentally equipped to post in a stunningly inebriated condition. There are many on this board, who shall go unnamed, who can post just fine in a condition that the Police and medical professionals would describe only as: Clinically Dead. Some posters cannot, and therefore we should eliminate their ability to post in the likely timing of this condition in order to allow the board to remain free for the use of our decent, law-abiding (sometimes) and more valued members.

These are only some of the principles for which I stand, but for the most part I feel that our boards should be ruled with an Iron Fist for the make benefit of our glorious and more important members on the backs of the unwashed proletariat hordes!

Thats what I, Locke stand for, so remember, vote Locke for Internet President!!

07-24-2009, 11:00 AM	#12
Locke Franchise Player Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Income Tax Central Exp:	This is my Campaign: Copied from the Random Thoughts Thread This is my Platform for my Campaign to be elected Internet President: People are so much more concerned about getting thanked than of saying anything of value, and for the most part, there is little wrong with this, however, there should be more stringent limits on who is allowed to be thanked for instance no noobs and no Oiler fans should be allowed to be thanked, but they should be allowed to thank us for all of our superior insight, understanding and limitless hockey-related knowledge. Secondly, there should be an additional feature, 'The Bitchslap.' Veteran posters should be allowed to 'bitchslap' any poster in their first 3 months of membership, its a minor feature, but it would then ban that poster from the boards for about 40 minutes. I think that would smarten people up. Furthermore, I propose a poster curfew. Noobs and the elderly should not be allowed on the boards after 10:00, I see too many brand new posters carrying on an E-Squabbles late into the wee hours of the morning. Its like watching 'The View' when you're not drunk or high, Dante referred to it in his 'Divine Comedy' as the 10th circle of Hell. The only conclusion that I can come to is that these individuals are not responsible enough to know when to call it a bitchfest and go to bed, nor are they sufficiently mentally equipped to post in a stunningly inebriated condition. There are many on this board, who shall go unnamed, who can post just fine in a condition that the Police and medical professionals would describe only as: Clinically Dead. Some posters cannot, and therefore we should eliminate their ability to post in the likely timing of this condition in order to allow the board to remain free for the use of our decent, law-abiding (sometimes) and more valued members. These are only some of the principles for which I stand, but for the most part I feel that our boards should be ruled with an Iron Fist for the make benefit of our glorious and more important members on the backs of the unwashed proletariat hordes! Thats what I, Locke stand for, so remember, vote Locke for Internet President!! __________________ The Beatings Shall Continue Until Morale Improves! This Post Has Been Distilled for the Eradication of Seemingly Incurable Sadness. The World Ends when you're dead. Until then, you've got more punishment in store. - Flames Fans If you thought this season would have a happy ending, you haven't been paying attention.