Some random thoughts:
- have owned a 2000 A4 2.8L for the last 4 years and there has been absolutely no problems with it. I think Audis in the past were not as solidly build, and had some problems,as half the people i know always ask how much money i spend on repairing it. The newer ones definately are pretty solid.
-one major thing with audis is that the suspension craps out earlier then other cars ( i dont know about bmw's), but you usually have to get this done after 200,000 km (japanese cars are usually good for twice that, accoring to my mechanic).
- yes, bmw drivers are usually labeled douch bags
- i just upgraded to an S4 (and am selling my A4, msg me if interested) and it is a totally different driving experience then an A4. Even though they are only a year apart, they drive different, and just have a way different feel to them, due to different suspensions (i think). We also have an A6 in family and that handles different too.
- oil changes, you can get done anywhere, where they stock the proper oil filters, while other fluids i get from the dealership
-my mechanic i go to, says 90% of his business is from Bmw/audi/vw (and no he doesnt specialize), so i guess a Lexus might be a better choice
-Audi's just look better, in and out if you ask me
-All wheen drive is amazing, as your car just handles great
-so in general its fairly hard to compare one brand to another, but rather you would have to do a certain series. A4 vs. Bmw 300's, or S4 vs M3, etc.