Quote:
Originally Posted by peter12
Maybe, but certain types of mental illness can be controlled. I know people can kill themselves out of a broken heart and that is almost inevitable, but many, many who do are just selfish cowards who take the easy way out and leave their loved ones to pick up the pieces.
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Mood is a huge mystery to the medical sciences. Think of it this way: mood affects your quality of life every single day. It affects your productivity, affects your sense of optimism about the future, affects your relationships and your sex life in equal measure. Your mood can even kill you--and for millions of people it does.
But we don't really know why it does any of these things, and the mechanisms by which mood is regulated in the brain are very poorly understood. There are some drugs that work well for some people, and there are people who can't find drugs that help--and the trouble is that medical science doesn't yet understand exactly how these drugs even work in a lot of cases.
But there is one thing that is abundantly clear. Depression and bipolar disorder--both disorders that affect mood--are
diseases of the brain. Killing yourself isn't normal--no matter what your circumstances are. Our minds are quite resilient under normal circumstances, and plenty of people deal with horrifying situations without committing suicide. Others commit suicide because in spite of nothing bad having happened to them, they just can't get any pleasure out of life no matter what they try.
I think of it this way: suicide isn't good or bad, cowardly or brave. It just IS, much like dying of cancer or liver disease. People who commit suicide are people who have died of an illness, an illness that claims millions of lives every year, and which doesn't have a cure--though it does have treatments that can help a lot.
Anyone who doesn't think depression is a legitimate illness hasn't met a person who is truly depressed. Depressed isn't when you feel sad because your team didn't win. Depressed is when you can't bring yourself to get out of bed for days or weeks on end, or when you can watch a hilarious movie and not crack a smile, or look a loved one in the eye and feel only emptiness inside yourself.
And no, I'm not a sufferer. But I am close to one--someone with bipolar disorder. It's serious stuff, and thank god for drugs. But it's a disease. Suicide isn't a normal behaviour; it's a pathological one.
flameswin, I'm sorry for your loss. But I feel 100% confident in saying that you didn't cause this to happen. You may find that cold comfort now, but when you've grieved for your loss I hope that you can let go of the guilt and move on with your life. It's what your friend would want.