Quote:
Originally Posted by flameswin
That's the conclusion I've been trying to come to, but it may take a bit of time.
The problem with this situation, is that we made some music together a while ago, and he was pumped and mentioned that singing those songs was a release, and the best he'd felt in a long time.
So when he wanted to get back into it, he looked to me, and said he needed to play those songs to feel good again, and said it had to be me specifically. The problem is, he's really driven when it comes to his music, so it wouldn't have been as easy as me renting some drums and us jamming here and there, he would again, see it as the only thing important in his life, and would have needed to jam 4 or 5 nights a week, and would have expected to be be playing shows every weekend, and I'm at a stage where I can't commit to that anymore.
So for me, it was a commitment that would have weighed me down, and strained everything else I enjoy, but I also had no idea he was that bad.
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It is normal for you to feel guilt, this person is obviously someone who was a big part of your life at some point in time.
I think in order for you to get rid of your guilt, you will have to make a list of what things you actually have control of in your life. And you know what? The list of things we actually have any control over is very short.
You are probably having trouble with that list right now and your mind is trying to tell you that you had some control over the situation, if only if....
But it is not your fault and this is something that was out of your control. Talk it through with a professional...they can help you find the answers.