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Old 03-11-2009, 09:55 PM   #49
jammies
Basement Chicken Choker
 
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: In a land without pants, or war, or want. But mostly we care about the pants.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stang View Post
Is 6-8 hours a week to myself too much?
See, this is why I'm never getting married. The answer to this should be, "Unless you are out scoring crack or banging skanks, no, it's not."

I think the people recommending you try to understand how your wife feels and propitiate her as if she was some kind of goddess are way off base. Going out two nights out of seven is no big deal, if she doesn't want to go out that's her problem, not yours - why should you have to do all the compromising and communicating while she gets to play martyr?

Maybe she feels lonely when you're away. Maybe she's worried you're going to become a drunk. Maybe she wonders if you are *really* with the guys like you say? What difference does it make - what it comes down to is that she wants to control your behaviour, and that's not right.

I'd sit down and say, "Look, this is important to me and I don't like the way you are trying to make me guilty for doing something I enjoy; forcing me to quit is just going to make me resent you for what I see as a petty powerplay intended to show how you own me. I'll do whatever I can to give you whatever you need or desire, but I draw the line when you want to take something from me to make me unhappy."
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