This talk always gets me teared up. Condolences.
I have a silly story: The day I got my kitten a few years ago I held him tight, being my first pet I was so happy. Then I realized that in 15 or so years I'd be doing what you must be going through--terrible thought I know, but it's really helped me enjoy every day with him. I hope I can get many years with him.
I think what kills me is when he goes for his annual checkup he looks at me like I betrayed him, then when I take him home he holds on to me like i was his saviour. I don't think that I'll be able to survive that last day...
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