Quote:
Originally Posted by Azure
I also predict that in 10 years, my diet of milk, cheese, meat and eggs and green vegetables will be more successful than any 'fad' diet ever published in a book the past 30 years.
I just need to figure out how to give my diet a cool name, and deceive people into thinking it REALLY is something new.
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"Ploughboy's Regimen" - 'cause have you ever seen a fat ploughboy? Those dudes are skinnier than supermodels - or so I suspect, having never actually seen one. Which is probably because they are JUST THAT THIN!
"Regimen" also makes it sound manly - women have "plans" or "weight therapy" or "I wouldn't be a ginormous cow if I could only stop at one box of chocolatey Turtles". A regimen gives the impression that your diet is like being in the military, except that you don't get to blow stuff up or stand in the sun for hours.
Be sure to make up some crap about how this was passed on to you by some old farmer (preferably Asian - those Asians are wise when they're not off shooting up late-night noodle houses) who lived to be 104 years old and could still wear the same pants he wore on his wedding night. Mention that he would eat the eggs raw and mixed with warm whole milk, but since we're worthless and weak Westerners it is barely acceptable for us to cook the eggs and chill the milk.
Heck, I'll do the marketing for you. I'll go practice my crazy looks in the mirror right now.