Well one good one that an emcee did at a wedding that is PG enought to go on any time is.
Take the mike, ask the bride to place her hand on the table, than have the groom place his on top. Than proceed to tell the guests that they just witnessed last time the groom will ever have the upper hand in the relationship.
If all is going bad, just yell San Dimas Highschool Football rules and bolt out the door.
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"Some guys like old balls"
Patriots QB Tom Brady
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