[Traditional_Ale]

Originally Posted by OzSome

No kidding!! What's next? Changed the holiday "Thanksgiving" to something else.

I think they should change it to "Annual Meal of Noteworthy Importance" so as not to offend the descendants of the settlers who were too stupid to farm properly.

While we're at it, lets turn New Years into "Calendar Turn-Over Day" so as not to offend the people who wanted it to stay the former year for a while longer.

Easter can become "Choclate Day".

Rememberance Day should be renamed "War Sucks Day" because we wouldn't want to offend the virgin sensibilites of Little Johnny and Sally. Also to appease all the anti-war advocates.

Family Day would undoubtedly have to be renamed "Generic Holiday" because people without families wouldn't feel like they could participate (outside of a 12-case of beer and porn, but then how is that really different from now?).

St. Patricks Day would then have to be re-named "Binge Drinking Day" because alcoholism affects non-catholics too and they want their equal representation. Beer would be made available in all the colors of the rainbow.

Good Friday would become just "Friday" much like 9-11 the date has become "9-11". This is so the catholics could celebrate the brith of their religion, and non-catholics could utter the title in total disdain and everyone would understand what they mean without having to actually say anything non-PC.

Victoria Day I think would survive unscathed.

National Aboriginal Day would too, but we would then have to create National Original Day and National Un-Original Day.

Canada Day would be renaimed "Home Day" because after all, we're a multi-cultural society that allows one to keep the beliefs and customs of their homeland. Including thinking its actually just superior in every way despite how much improved their quality of life is here.

Nunavut Day would have to be supplamented by a day for all the other provinces...equality and all.

Labour Day would be renamed "GDP Celebration Day" because if the blue-collars get a day, then the white collars that own their souls should get it by default. Right?

Christmas Day would be renamed "Stupid Fat Red F***er Day" because without Coca-Cola, we all wouldn't be going broke every year come December 25th while lying to our kids trying to get them to be obidient.

And my favorite....

Boxing Day would have the same name, but would become a national celebration of Boxing and MMA. UFC all-day, on every channel. Also $500 tax credits to every man, woman, and child who would get in the ring on public access TV and beat the crap out of each other.