I'm with your brother. If they can't be bothered to confirm that they are coming, screw 'em. The rudeness is all on the part of those who don't understand that this isn't casual night at the pub and you can't just drop on by if you feel you've nothing better to do that night.
Do you get to be a bridesmaid? If so, we expect pictures!
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Better educated sadness than oblivious joy.
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