[Crispy's Critter]

my best fart story happened a few years ago when I was getting serious with my gf at the time. We were at that stage where we had just started sharing a bed, and were contemplating moving in together, and she liked to sleep very close to me, or 'spoon' sometimes. Well this one particular night it was hotter than the hubs of hell, and she insisted on spooning, which made the unbearable heat even worse. I asked her to leave me alone a few times, asking very sweetly, telling her how normally I love being that close, but that being that it was so hot could she just not do it for that night. She thought I was just being 'cute' or whatever, and would just giggle and snuggle closer. All of a sudden I feel this pressure building inside, which gave me a wicked idea. I said "if you don't back off a bit I'm going to fart on you." Again she thought I was being cute, and told me to "go ahead" while simultaneously hugging me as tight as she could. So I let the pressure build a bit more, then forced it out with every ounce of strength I could muster. It came out with a kind of *WHOMP* sound, like a concussion charge. She screamed and jumped up as fast as she could, while yelling "I FELT IT ON MY LEG!!! FRIGGIN' GROSS!!!" My response was to roll over facing away from her and say "told you", yawn loudly, and settle in for a nice sleep.