I own a BMW and I think you should go with the Subaru for what you are looking for. I haven't had any problems with the 7k I've put on it so far, but that is probably to be expected of new cars, so I'm not jaded as of yet. But I have heard the horror stories of BMW Service.
While searching for my latest vehicle I test drove the WRX STI, and a BMW 3 series.
Subaru is probably the better car in that price range, especially if you are planning to have kids. I'd rather have the car with standard 4 wheel drive in Calgary Weather than the vehicle without.
The Subaru is a more powerful car, but not as nice of a ride and has a much more bland interior though.
The BMW is a more expensive car (quite a bit more infact), but has a far superior interior, quieter ride and the smoothest car I've ever driven.
The cheapest model version with 4 wheel drive is the 328xi (new). Otherwise go with the Subaru. I ended up going with the 328xi and it is night and day compared to front wheel/2 wheel drive. BMWs are Rear-Wheel standard, so getting the xdrive is something you should seriously consider if you are going to drive this thing in Winter.
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