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Originally Posted by flamey_mcflame
So, we get life insurance,car insurance, house insurance on the off chance that we could have tragic things happen to us and we need to be covered for those statistical instances. Yet, you have a 50% chance of getting divorced and you think you shouldn't get a prenuptial because its not romantic or whatever you're rationale is. People need to protect their assets and their personal interests on the likelihood that a divorce might occur. It's in everyone's best interest that a future outcome with a 50 percent probability is taking into account. Save the romance for anniversaries, Saturday nights and Valentine's Day. People get married for all the right reasons, but a lifetime is a long time. Heck, 10 years is a long time.
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Yep, there's a 50% chance that a marriage might end in divorce. There's many reasons they end that way. Sometimes one or both partners change, sometimes the relationship is faced with obstacles (addictions, adultery, death of a child, etc.) that the couple just can't work their way through. I think a lot of times it's because marriage has come to be viewed as disposable, like so many aspects of our society.
However, entering into a life long partnership with the mind set that it is "likely" to end in divorce, and that romance in a marriage is a secondary consideration that can be assigned to dedicated occassions like "anniversaries, Saturday nights and Valentine's Day" makes a divorce a self-fulfilling prophecy. And I think prenuptials are a part and parcel of that.
I've been married twice, so I certainly conform to that 50% demographic. My first marriage lasted 3 years, and my second has lasted 20 years and counting, and it's getting stronger every year. If I had been more mature and honest with myself prior to my first marriage I would have admitted it wasn't a match made in heaven, and that it had the potential to fail. At no time have I ever had doubts about my second wife. Our relationship was solid and felt "right" from the very beginning. I had and have no doubts that she is the perfect person to be my wife. I guess what I'm saying is that when it's right, you know it, and when it's not right, you also know it. Or at least you should know these things before making a major, life time decision like getting married. Therefore, to me, a prenuptial is an admission that things aren't right, and it becomes part of that self-fulfilling divorce prophecy.
Those are just my opinions based on my experience. Every situation is different, and there is no clear cut right or wrong. But, again, based on my experience, there are some generalizations that I think apply to most situations.