[Locke]

Last year in Co-Ed Rec indoor soccer, the team we were playing against had this short girl as their goalkeeper.

This wasnt much of a game, we had it in control fairly early on, we were trying to maintain pressure on them and I was playing defense at the first line when this perfect cross-field pass comes at me.

I mean perfect. There was nobody in the way, a clear shooting lane, the whole works.

So I one-timed this thing all the way to hell.

It smoked her right on the nose. Blood everywhere. Her face went off like Old Faithful, just a geyser of blood all over the place.

It gets worse. The ball still has a ton of energy.

So she falls flat on her back with her head on the goal line and this thing goes straight up into the air and its falling in slow-motion.

So this spinning ball of bloody death lands right on her nose again and trickles into the net.

She is screaming and crying and bleeding....I just went straight to the bench. Everyone was totally shocked that I had just ended this chick.