[CaptainCrunch]

A reading from the book of Sutter as the letter to Larry Kelly

And yes we did rejoice upon your bestowment of this gift to our congregation. And forever do we hold you in the highest esteem as we present your with the vestements of $36 million pieces of gold, two cases of mead and a powerboat with deep water fishing equipment.

And it was good, as the savior came across the vastness of the oceans and did reward the faithful with feats of wonder and daring.

And yeh, on his first appearance he did banish the evils presented by the whale, the wheel and the shark. And though our savior was vanquished in a battle with the elements, and the gods themselves did frown opon this church on that very day, we were given a vision. That our goaltender would not go to work for the dark apostles serving the Kings, or into the service of the devils, or drown in the black pit of Oil. But that he would continue to drive the Flames in front of him, and pull them through the desert from behind.

And it was good.

And you brother Larry, with a reasoned Brow, and a gilted chair did lift up our hearts, and you, and our savior did pronounce that you would be there, to rule over our hearts for a period of no less then 6 years, and that the Oil, and the whale, and the Mountains and the very Wild would all in that time be subserviant to us.

Amen.