Quote:
Originally Posted by Ford Prefect
Have you ever been, or had a son, who was 16? At that age, hormones pretty much stage a coup and hold the brain for hostage. All the good teaching and ground work in the world isn't going to do much good at that point, and wee Willy is going to be making all the decisions for the lad.
We have a 16 year-old-daughter, and we've tried to teach her to make the right and responsible decisions and abstain from sex until she's at least 18, or older if she wishes to be celibate until married. But we're not fools either ... some 16-year-olds are going to experiment with sex. So we're tried to teach her to make the right and responsible decisions in that situation too ... ie, safe sex. We don't encourage that option, but we're not going to stick out heads in the sand and ignore it's possibility either. Personally, I'd rather she have a boyfriend who is a good kid, but having safe sex with her and treating her with respect, than for her to date someone who is going to treat her like dirt, or kill her while driving impaired, or get her hooked on crack. There are worse things in the world than 16-year-olds having sex.
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I most certainly have had both a son and a daughter at that age. BUT, we are not talking about a 16 year old here, we are talking about a 22 year old wanting to have sex with someone who is considerably younger than him.
I raised my children as you have described raising your children. I am not naive as to what went on then or what goes on now. BUT, if you are teaching your children to treat the opposite sex with respect, and it works both ways, then why at 22 are we having an issue of him wanting to have sex with someone considerably younger than him, someone who might be a minor and not of the age of consent.
You try to lay the groundwork during the difficult teenage years and then hopefully they have the decision process to make responsible decisions at the age of 22.