Newark Star-Ledger, August 1, 2006
He Can't Be Serious ... Can He?
Tom Sietz, with AP Reports
The New Jersey Devils today introduced their new General Manager to the press during a conference held at Continental Airlines Arena.
"Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, I am sure you would like to speak to our new GM, so I'll just introduce him. From Calgary, Alberta, Steve R."
Up to the podium stepped the new man-in-charge, who said simply, "I am here to answer any of your questions, so shoot."
First up was a procedural question: How do you spell your last name? Is it Arr?
"My last name is R. Like Kenny G, or Master P," was the reply.
Everyone had a chuckle, as of course, Master P is not a legal name, and the ice was broken. He wasn't serious, anyway ... was he?
Next: What is your philosophy for this team? Where do you see them finishng this year?
"Any tradeable assets currently on our team will be moved for prospects, draft picks, young players, taken from teams looking to improve themselves now."
A reporter observed that would make for a long, difficult season, or more, for Devils fans.
"We are rebuilding. In order to do that, we will need good draft picks."
A round of silence, followed by the last hockey-related question of the day: does this mean that there are no untouchables on this team?
"Of course there are no untouchables," responded Steve R. "Anyone on the team is available for trade."
The final question of the day elicited an incredible response. How does the new GM excuse a week-long trip to Seattle immediately after being hired, when the team obviously needs a lot of work?
"I never went there."
James Hollison, of a rival paper, stood up, and said, "But, Steve, there are pictures of you at baseball games in Seattle."
"Oh, Seattle, yes, I did go there, I thought you said Iowa City. I've never been there. Well, it's about time for me to sit down for lunch. Thank you for coming in."
Last edited by Antithesis; 08-01-2006 at 11:46 AM.