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Old 04-27-2012, 01:20 PM   #1
undercoverbrother
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Default Something I witnessed today.

I volunteered at my boy's school today. He is in Kindergarten.

In his class is a special needs boy. He has a full time helper. I am not sure what his issue is, it appears to be an emotional control thing, for want of a better term I would say Autistic. He would be disruptive to the class, and would be put outside the classroom till he could calm down. The first thing that went through my mind was "why is he in this class?" Everytime he was disruptive, he was taken out. About 30-60 mins between issue, sometimes less than 30 mins. All i could think was why is this one child being allowed to distrup the other kids learning. Often one group of kids were left to their own devices while the disruptive kids was dealth with.

Later in the morning I was in the hallway taking down some art the kids did. While I was out there the boy was put out again for something. As i was nearby something very interesting happened. Another boy (I would reckon grade 4 or 5) came up to the child and said "I used to have trouble like you as well when I was younger". He then proceeded to walk the child through breathing exercises to calm him down. He talked to him helped him realize what he had done to get put in the hall, as it turns out he has issues when he is not first in line. The older boy talk him through the issues and the child calmy knocked on the boy door and was let into class. As this was ending the VP came by and was about to interupt these two boys. I called her over and explained waht happened. She get a hugh smile and seaid the older boy was worse than the young one when he was in Kindergarten. Made me realize that might be the reason the young child is in with the other kids, so he could be exposed to "good" behavouir and learn kids like the older boy.

It was very nice also to see the VP pull the older boy aside and huge him and congratulate him on his "mentoring" of the younger boy.
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Old 04-27-2012, 01:23 PM   #2
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damn you - just when I'm convinced that humanity is scum, you go and tell me this and my hope doesn't completely die...
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Old 04-27-2012, 01:37 PM   #3
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made my day man!!!
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Old 04-27-2012, 01:39 PM   #4
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made my day man!!!
yeah mine too.
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Old 04-27-2012, 01:44 PM   #5
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The VP will be fired for hugging (or hugeing in this case) him.
meh excuse me, I was typing while on the phone......
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Old 04-27-2012, 01:50 PM   #6
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If I go home and make my wife read your post she will cry. Anyone else have a wife like this?

I actually love it. It's one of my favorite things about her.
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Old 04-27-2012, 01:53 PM   #7
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If I go home and make my wife read your post she will cry. Anyone else have a wife like this?
I do.
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Old 04-27-2012, 01:58 PM   #8
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If I go home and make my wife read your post she will cry. Anyone else have a wife like this?

I actually love it. It's one of my favorite things about her.
That my friend is the path to getting a historically epic Sammy
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Old 04-27-2012, 02:02 PM   #9
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The other kids should also learn early that life is full of distractions that are out of your control and some times you need to be patient while they are dealt with.
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Old 04-27-2012, 02:08 PM   #10
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That's great stuff.

I used to teach in a school primarily for kids with attention and learning disability issues. A good majority of the students were on the autistic spectrum.

Peer bonding through these things is absolutely essential to these children learning to adapt and understand their behaviour, emotions and community around them.

It's also imperative in my view, that students in the classroom who are not acting out or have learning difficulties etc, be exposed to this early on in a non-judgemental environment. The older boy in this scenario may have learned what he passed on by himself, from someone else, or it may have just been a part of his development, but having him integrated in the classroom necessitated he learn this coping mechanism. Segregating these children doesn't benefit anyone in the class in my view.

I liken it to a noisy, whiny puppy. Take a dog home by themselves as a puppy, they are acting out all over the place. Take a puppy home in a house with another dog, they pick things up FAR quicker.

A big part of my job there was working with the most disruptive kids. It's a delicate balance, but I would often employ the 'buddy system' when dealing with particularly aggressive or emotional outbursts/issues. Kids with Asbergers/Autism will sometimes do a kind of twin talk that teachers or adults may not perceive or understand how to steer.

Some kids, on the other hand, simply test the boundaries as part of their routine. Unfortunately, I think many teachers/administrators take this personally. Again, like a puppy, if you don't take it personally when a kid loses his mind on you (or a puppy bites you too hard), you'll both get through the outburst faster.

I think AFC Wilmbledon works in a similar field, he might have a different take.
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Old 04-27-2012, 02:29 PM   #11
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The other kids should also learn early that life is full of distractions that are out of your control and some times you need to be patient while they are dealt with.
I don't think I would say they need to learn to deal with distractions, but having all sorts of different kids in a class is the best way to teach them empathy.

I know that the whole food allergy thing is a pain in the butt, however my son always reminds us that there are kids in his kindergarten class that are allergic to nuts, dairy, etc. and that I have to be careful about what snacks I give to him to take to class. I think the more opportunity for kids to grow up around people who are different than them the better for their future.

Also, kindergarten is pretty much a year of playing, socializing, and some basic reading and math. I don't think at that stage a distraction to their learning process will hold any kids back. Not to detract from the beautiful story, but why did the OP wonder why the kid was in the class? The class learns to empathy and patience with their friend, and the other kid learns acceptable behavior.
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Old 04-27-2012, 02:33 PM   #12
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Not to detract from the beautiful story, but why did the OP wonder why the kid was in the class?
Because, the situation was new to me. I was not enlightened enough to realize the reason(s)...........now I do.
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Old 04-27-2012, 02:36 PM   #13
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I don't think I would say they need to learn to deal with distractions, but having all sorts of different kids in a class is the best way to teach them empathy.

I know that the whole food allergy thing is a pain in the butt, however my son always reminds us that there are kids in his kindergarten class that are allergic to nuts, dairy, etc. and that I have to be careful about what snacks I give to him to take to class. I think the more opportunity for kids to grow up around people who are different than them the better for their future.

Also, kindergarten is pretty much a year of playing, socializing, and some basic reading and math. I don't think at that stage a distraction to their learning process will hold any kids back. Not to detract from the beautiful story, but why did the OP wonder why the kid was in the class? The class learns to empathy and patience with their friend, and the other kid learns acceptable behavior.
Kindergarten is all about distractions, I think sometimes we take normal kids behavior in a chaotic social environment and want to attach medical conditions to it, or mental conditions to it.

When I was that young I would have been hopped up on so many pills that I would still be a zombie. Once I learned the words to the song Valley of the Dinosaurs, I was bellowing that out at the top of my lungs for 8 hours a day for a month.
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Old 04-27-2012, 02:41 PM   #14
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What would it be like if we moved all kids/people to special settings to be with their "OWN".

Inclusion is where its at and it has a huge benefit for kids to see that everyone is different and everyone learns differently. I would LOVE for there to be autistic kids, down kids, CP kids, kids in wheelchairs in my sons classroom. It teaches them to be sensitive to others around them and to he helpful and tollerable to peers that may have certain obstacles they are dealing with.

Nothing would make me prouder as a parent for my son/daughter to learn and understand about kids that are "different". Math, volleyball, track, etc... meh..... What counts in life is how my kids treat others and the rest will follow.... just my 2 cents

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Old 04-27-2012, 02:47 PM   #15
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damn you - just when I'm convinced that humanity is scum, you go and tell me this and my hope doesn't completely die...
No, despite this outlier, you're right. Humanity is scum. The week I've had proves it.
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Old 04-27-2012, 02:53 PM   #16
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No, despite this outlier, you're right. Humanity is scum. The week I've had proves it.
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Old 04-27-2012, 03:07 PM   #17
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What would it be like if we moved all kids/people to special settings to be with their "OWN".

Inclusion is where its at and it has a huge benefit for kids to see that everyone is different and everyone learns differently. I would LOVE for there to be autistic kids, down kids, CP kids, kids in wheelchairs in my sons classroom. It teaches them to be sensitive to others around them and to he helpful and tollerable to peers that may have certain obstacles they are dealing with.

Nothing would make me prouder as a parent for my son/daughter to learn and understand about kids that are "different". Math, volleyball, track, etc... meh..... What counts in life is how my kids treat others and the rest will follow.... just my 2 cents
Do our kids go to school together?

Anyway, at that age, inclusion works so well. The kids don't have any biases or anything. All they care about is playing and having fun. If a kid is in a wheelchair they think its cool that they have their own wheels. If a kid is autistic, but can build an awesome Lego castle, that's all that matters. Its really nice to see that the differences don't make a difference to kids.

I am old and cynical now, but I wonder how great it would feel to not have any prejudices in my mind. When I get a phone call from a strange number, I am not filled with magic about what this mystery caller could want, or if somebody came up to me on the street I wouldn't naturally jump to the conclusion that they just want money or to sign me up for some useless credit card.

I do wonder though if when these kids grow up, what will they be like as adults. One side of me thinks they'll be great and they'll live in peace and harmony, but another thinks will they be competitive enough - if there is some threat, say in 30 years, the US wants to take over part of Canada, would this generation fight for it, or just say, "it's cool, they can have it".
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Old 04-27-2012, 03:41 PM   #18
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What a great slice of life! Thanks for providing some perspective to a new father. I am always worried about the state of our schools and kids in general, and this does give me a lot of hope.

Thanks for sharing again!
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Old 04-27-2012, 03:48 PM   #19
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So the Boy just went out to play after getting home from school. When he came home I asked how his day was. He said it was good and asked if I could volunteer again. I asked who he played with this afternoon, he listed of 3-4 kids and one of those was the "troubled boy" in his class. I asked what he was like. My boy said be was nice, but that he got upset sometimes, i tried to say something useful, and my son cut me off and said "it's ok dad, everyone is different and I like him".
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Old 04-27-2012, 04:59 PM   #20
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Story about young kids that... isn't bad?

Do we still kill them?
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