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Old 07-14-2017, 03:46 PM   #8101
Cameron Swift
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the kernel sanders secret recipe
So that's where popcorn chicken comes from.

edit: goddamnit
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Old 07-14-2017, 03:50 PM   #8102
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Not swift enough, it seems... but your joke was better.
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Old 07-14-2017, 04:25 PM   #8103
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But they do have kernel Sanders in there. The code name for the Android kernel 6.3 was Sanders.
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Old 07-14-2017, 04:34 PM   #8104
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I saw a man today wearing a t-shirt that boasted: "Lets save time and agree that I know everything."

I felt like telling him obviously he doesn't know everything as he doesn't know the proper use of apostrophes.
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Old 07-14-2017, 04:35 PM   #8105
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I'm going to think this one over tonight while I get pickled.


Is that how it works? I can't wait to get home and get spocked up.
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Old 07-14-2017, 04:36 PM   #8106
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But they do have kernel Sanders in there. The code name for the Android kernel 6.3 was Sanders.
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Old 07-14-2017, 08:14 PM   #8107
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Had a great, quiet old neighbour for years. He had to go and die and leave the property to the idiot son. They're on their third loud backyard party in the last 8 days. Nothing wrong with a party on a Friday night, but no doubt it'll be loud until 1 AM or later.

Hey, idiot son: if you're reading this, you're an inconsiderate dick.

Signed,
The guy who yelled at you Monday night.
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Old 07-14-2017, 08:53 PM   #8108
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Backyard wood burners. FU skids. Hope your stupid trampoline burns down.
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Old 07-14-2017, 08:58 PM   #8109
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When someone asks you to help fix their phone and then keep wanting to take it out of your hands like they've got the kernel sanders secret recipe in there. I can't fix your god damn phone if you won't let me hold it for longer than 12 seconds.
They're nervous you're going to stumble upon their dick pics
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Old 07-14-2017, 11:11 PM   #8110
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Backyard wood burners. FU skids. Hope your stupid trampoline burns down.
Just call in an open fire. CFD will come and put it out.
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Old 07-15-2017, 04:46 AM   #8111
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Just call in an open fire. CFD will come and put it out.
For real? I wouldn't do that but is it legal to have a fire?
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Old 07-15-2017, 04:59 AM   #8112
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Open fires aren't legal.

Fire pits are legal, but there are rules for them: http://www.calgary.ca/CSPS/Fire/Page...Fire-pits.aspx

The flames can't be greater than 1m in height or width and the pit must be covered by a mesh screen. Fires aren't allowed past midnight Monday to Friday or 1am on Saturday or Sunday.

The people also have to comply with the noise bylaw after 10pm.
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Old 07-15-2017, 09:25 AM   #8113
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I hate watching a football game and seeing a player get up from making a play that happens to get a first down and they do the stupid, drop the ball and an annoying two armed point that they got the first down. Yeah, we know its a first down you clown. We can see the yard markers, the digital first down line and the refs, who actually have the job of pointing for the first down.
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Old 07-15-2017, 09:28 AM   #8114
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Just call in an open fire. CFD will come and put it out.
Good way to abuse 911 and fire department resources.
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Old 07-15-2017, 10:48 AM   #8115
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Quote:
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Just call in an open fire. CFD will come and put it out.
Are you my old neighbour? They called CFD a few times saying I had a huge fire burning treated wood.

Then the CFD shows up, sees my small fire in a firepit with my axe and stack of pine beside it and laugh with me about the neighbourhood idiot.

Good work wasting resources.

Last edited by Canehdianman; 07-15-2017 at 12:36 PM.
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Old 07-15-2017, 12:35 PM   #8116
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ironhorse View Post
Just call in an open fire. CFD will come and put it out.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Canehdianman View Post
Are you my old neighbour? They called CFD a few times saying I had a huge fire burning treated wood.

Then the CFD shows up, sees my small fire in a fireplace with my axe and stack of pine beside it and laugh with me about the neighbourhood idiot.

Good work wasting resources.
Haha. Busted, old man

Last edited by #22; 07-15-2017 at 03:00 PM.
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Old 07-15-2017, 05:36 PM   #8117
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Canehdianman View Post
Are you my old neighbour? They called CFD a few times saying I had a huge fire burning treated wood.

Then the CFD shows up, sees my small fire in a firepit with my axe and stack of pine beside it and laugh with me about the neighbourhood idiot.

Good work wasting resources.
When I was in high school at a house party one time the neighbor called the fire department on us for having too big of a fire. They didn't put it out or anything, just told us to keep it under control
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Old 07-15-2017, 06:18 PM   #8118
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I'll let you in on a little secret. I make a lot of #### up. This may or may not involve the names of Android kernels.
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Old 07-15-2017, 06:52 PM   #8119
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Quote:
Originally Posted by taco.vidal View Post
Good way to abuse 911 and fire department resources.
Usually the winking emoticon means sarcasm.
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Old 07-16-2017, 05:38 AM   #8120
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Getting old and soft GMG. My "fun" Calgary buddy missed my bday a couple weeks ago so we decided to rage last night in honour of it. Met up with him at 7:45, by just after 10:30 I was getting sick in the parking lot and had to catch a cab home. Place wasn't even busy yet and I was K.O'd, remind me not to do shots anymore. Felt like I was out for one hour, that's just embarrassing, 20-something Sainters would be rolling in his grave if he saw that performance..

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