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Old 09-22-2016, 04:27 PM   #421
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As someone who has reffed for 15 + years, I can honestly say that this isn't a bad idea. I have seen the handshake as an opportune time for players and coaches to get their digs in one last time. To me it became pointless and the kids were just doing it because it had always been done. There was minimal sincerity there at best.

As for the story about the coach making a kid well up, it happens more than you think. I help the younger refs in our community by being in the stands and supervising them, and the things that come out of a parent's mouth is disturbing. More than a handful of situations have arose where i've had to console a young kid as they skate off the ice looking to refuse to ref again.

Rant over. Sorry Northendzone, hope that community tryouts go well for you boy
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Old 09-22-2016, 11:13 PM   #422
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when I was growing up, if coaches parents whoever was yelling at a ref, they'd frequently just toss em from the rink. Game doesn't continue until #### brick over here leaves.

My brother's friend was a ref... he absolutely loved tossing morons behaving like wild animals at a children's game. Think about how pathetic that is. So ridiculous. Yelling and screaming, just absurd.
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Old 09-23-2016, 12:02 PM   #423
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when I was growing up, if coaches parents whoever was yelling at a ref, they'd frequently just toss em from the rink. Game doesn't continue until #### brick over here leaves.

My brother's friend was a ref... he absolutely loved tossing morons behaving like wild animals at a children's game. Think about how pathetic that is. So ridiculous. Yelling and screaming, just absurd.
Easier said that done when you are asking a 12 year old kid to get rid of a grown adult when they are scared to even blow their whistle the first few times.
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Old 09-23-2016, 12:15 PM   #424
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Parents in the stands need to stand up for the kids and tell these people to pipe down as well.
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Old 09-23-2016, 12:16 PM   #425
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Easier said that done when you are asking a 12 year old kid to get rid of a grown adult when they are scared to even blow their whistle the first few times.
I have seen the RCMP come as a result of a PeeWee B game.

Parents, shouting a refs, filming the ref.

All sorts.


####ing disgusting.
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Old 09-23-2016, 12:24 PM   #426
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those parents who shout at refs should actually be suspended from entering the arena and then told that before they can return they must take the requisite clinics and then be forced to ref about 20 games and show the current refs how it is done
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Old 09-23-2016, 12:47 PM   #427
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hahahaha...that sounds like a blast
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Old 09-23-2016, 01:18 PM   #428
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When I was a board member for a hockey assn, we would try to go to as many games as possible. I threw a grandpa out of the rink for yelling at a ref, at a peewee div 7 game. Felt good.
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Old 09-23-2016, 01:59 PM   #429
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When I was a board member for a hockey assn, we would try to go to as many games as possible. I threw a grandpa out of the rink for yelling at a ref, at a peewee div 7 game. Felt good.
How can you even care who wins a div 7 peewee game?
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Old 09-23-2016, 02:01 PM   #430
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The honest truth it's the younger ages where there is the problem. The older they get most parent's have accepted where things are going to be. And the higher caliber hockey you get to I know of quite a few coaches who have not chosen a certain player because they did not want to deal with the parent(s).
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Old 09-23-2016, 02:14 PM   #431
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You know to me the bottom line is and I coach and I see it alot and its killing the volunteer movement for sports for coaches and refs and even for players coming out

If your're a middle aged person and as a coach you need to yell and scream and rant and rave at refs, it doesn't make you a good coach, it makes you an idiot, stop coaching.

If you're a young coach learning how to do the job, and you're following the lead of your head coach who yells and screams at kids and referee's, then you should go find a better mentor.

If your a coach and you feel the need to yell at some kid in house league or a kind under the age of 18 who might still be playing the game not because he believes he's going to the big leagues but he loves the game. Congratulations lug nut, you soul killing psycho, please for the love of god stop coaching.

If you as a coach feel the need to confront, or belittle the other volunteers or parents that help our your program, or slam the other coaches in your organization or program. Stop coaching period. In fact stop following sport and maybe go take up something that your better build for like I don't know pro-wrestling.

And finally if after a game, your still a freaking rage monster and you need to yell or scream at kids, parents and especially referees you need professional help.

Look, its rare that some guy that's coaching 12 year old or 13 or 14 year old kids in football or hockey or whatever is going to go on to a coaching career that pays money. So these coaches need to stop emulating coaches who coach professionals who are getting paid to be there.

The bottom line to me, is we're already starting to see the erosion of kids playing sports in organized leagues because there's a group of coaches out there that still coach "The old school", "I should be coaching in the CFL or NHL cause I'm so intense" and they just suck the fun out of the game, and make it impossible on volunteer refs or umpires or whatever.

What's even worse is the erosion of returning players, the kids who get one of two years in and realize that its not fun to have some coach screaming at him or her, or its just stupid and embarressing to see your coach or your dad with a bulging eye ball, pulsing forehead veins and a purple face screaming at some teenager wearing a referees' jersey because "Holy crap he was offside you incompetent %%%%%%% yer screwing my kids"
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Old 09-23-2016, 04:56 PM   #432
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The honest truth it's the younger ages where there is the problem. The older they get most parent's have accepted where things are going to be. And the higher caliber hockey you get to I know of quite a few coaches who have not chosen a certain player because they did not want to deal with the parent(s).
For sure, kids get black balled because of the parents all the time. When you're going to be spending most of the winter with these people. Most of us want a good group. Winning is nice, but hanging with good people is even better.
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Old 09-25-2016, 04:43 PM   #433
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bit of proud papa talking here but also maybe some reason for optimism for others on here

my guy after being cut in both of years of Bantam (and at one point he was an atom 9 player) just made minor midget AAA.

congrats bud
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Old 09-25-2016, 09:08 PM   #434
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^ congrats to him.

What a great story as it is hard to unseat guys who are already in the system.
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Old 09-26-2016, 10:40 AM   #435
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Regarding the hand shake thing, it's sad that it has come to this. In my experience as a coach I have not witnessed any animosity between teams/coaches and officials during the post game handshake buy hear (from my players) about punches, words etc. exchanged between players when they shale hands yet they are still keeping that portion of the post game which is baffling.

I understand the rationale of protecting the refs but am not sure if this will help. It ought to have the added benefit of protecting some coaches from suspension due to verbal abuse of officials if indeed it does reduce altercations between coaches and officials. So that is good I suppose.

It is a shame though. As a coach sometimes things get a little heated during the game and the post game handshake was a good way for me to reiterate to the officials that I appreciated their efforts and to thank them for it. It also allowed me on many occasions to ask them about a particular call or circumstance and the good ones always took the time to explain it to me which I very much appreciated. If the exchange was civil I found that the vast majority of them were more than willing to spend a minute of two with you giving their perspective. There were times I was able to offer an opinion to how they may have handled the situation differently (without changing the call) in order to keep a situation from escalating which the good ones also seemed to appreciate.
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Old 09-27-2016, 11:30 AM   #436
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bit of proud papa talking here but also maybe some reason for optimism for others on here

my guy after being cut in both of years of Bantam (and at one point he was an atom 9 player) just made minor midget AAA.

congrats bud
It's awesome to hear stories like that. I often wonder watching my son and the kids his age, who are first year atom, if anyone is going to drop off as the game gets faster and more intense. Or if anyone is going to emerge, like your son.
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Old 09-27-2016, 12:26 PM   #437
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Forgot how much I love being on the ice with the kids. Coaching started again this past weekend, it's going to be a great year at the rink!
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Old 09-29-2016, 07:15 AM   #438
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after an erratic community evaluation cycle, last night I found out my son was placed on team 1 in our community.

had he been placed lower, I would have been working to talk him off of the ledge.

team does not practice until Sunday.
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Old 09-29-2016, 07:30 AM   #439
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I can only imagine your anxiety facing that, so its good to hear he made the top team.

I've just gone through community evals for my PeeWee goalie son and frustrating doesn't even touch the surface of the process.

I hate questioning things because I feel like I come across as "that parent" thinking my kid is the greatest in the world, but it really isn't that. I simply want my kid to be fairly placed where his skill level should have him - instead it seems like he's been the victim of an early "clerical error", which has dogged him and been a boat anchor on his final ranking.

The teams haven't even been picked yet, but I'm honestly concerned with how my kid will react to his placement and how it'll affect his future in the position. I try to have good talks with him every day about how this is 1 year of PeeWee and it isn't going to affect what he can do in the future, but he's 11 and seeing kids of lower skill levels being invited to higher up skates is crushing on him.
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Old 09-29-2016, 09:35 AM   #440
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^ ah, finally another goalie parent for me to commiserate with.

it is hard being a goalie - the simple way to look at it is that if you are the fifth ranked defenceman in your age category you are on team 1 - if you are the fifth ranked goalie, you are on team 3 - big difference.

even more frustrating is there are lots of knowledgeable hockey guys who do not have a hot clue about goalies and what to look for or what they are looking at.

to me the first year in a new age band is trying to get to the middle of the group, then second year is all about T1/T2.

if your kid really wants to stya in net you will become an armchair psychologist/therapist - it is simply a hard position to play and be good at due to both the mental and physical demands.
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